Next weekend starts our PRIDE classes, 6 days from now. We are making good progress on getting through our application and at getting things in order. But we still have a long list of things we need to do. All things in time!
Sunday, July 31, 2011
We are officially official!
We did it! We are officially married, really really this time. Its funny though, now we will have two certified marriage licenses, two certificates, and two anniversary dates! My new ring in beautiful and I am very happy to be wearing it. Thank you to Mandi and Tony for attending our re-wedding and BBQ at our place to celebrate (we forgot to eat the cake!) and to my brother-in-law David and his daughter Kaya for coming as well. Now to get on with everything else....
Next weekend starts our PRIDE classes, 6 days from now. We are making good progress on getting through our application and at getting things in order. But we still have a long list of things we need to do. All things in time!
Next weekend starts our PRIDE classes, 6 days from now. We are making good progress on getting through our application and at getting things in order. But we still have a long list of things we need to do. All things in time!
Friday, July 29, 2011
The big day.....again....
Well, tomorrow is the big day, again.
Wedding Day!
Really, its the beginning of a brand new chapter in our lives. Going to renew our vows, make our marriage legal (even though we have a certified copy of our marriage license from 2008, its not legal as we found out at the beginning of this year) and really get things going. We have a good amount of money saved, and are looking for a new place. There have been a couple of places that really have our attention but we still have a while before we will have the money saved and a while longer before we will be ready to move.
To Do List For Tomorrow:
Clean house
Re-blue my bangs
Meet Mandi at the nail shop at 9am
Make pasta salad
Get dressed
Get re-married
BBQ
We are now 7 days from our adoption classes!!
Wedding Day!
Really, its the beginning of a brand new chapter in our lives. Going to renew our vows, make our marriage legal (even though we have a certified copy of our marriage license from 2008, its not legal as we found out at the beginning of this year) and really get things going. We have a good amount of money saved, and are looking for a new place. There have been a couple of places that really have our attention but we still have a while before we will have the money saved and a while longer before we will be ready to move.
To Do List For Tomorrow:
Clean house
Re-blue my bangs
Meet Mandi at the nail shop at 9am
Make pasta salad
Get dressed
Get re-married
BBQ
We are now 7 days from our adoption classes!!
Sunday, July 24, 2011
I hate our couch!
We need a new couch in the worst possible way. Its torn up, smelled bad when we got it and still stinks, its uncomfortable and even when the dog sits on the couch her butt starts to sink in so just imagine what ours do. To top it off this morning I got up, as promised to take Emmy (Paul's dog) out to potty. She is used to getting up at about 3am with me. Normally this wouldn't have been that big of a deal but we didn't get to bed until about 2am.
When we got home last night I took all of the dogs out to potty and have a drink and some food before sending them to their beds for the night so little Emmy didn't make a peep until about 6am. Normally this would have given me about 4 hours of sleep and I would have sat, like a zombie, in front of the computer playing games. However, I have a very bad tooth that is causing so much pain that I have found myself in screaming pain that brings me to tears, and I had a really hard time sleeping. I fell asleep around 4:30-5am.
So, after taking princess Emmy out to potty I grabbed my pillow and a blanket and tried to sleep on the couch. I hate hate hate hate hate this couch! So there I am, cold, a cat on my head, Emmy wont leave me alone, tooth in pain, and now laying on the evil couch trying to sleep.... About an hour later Paul got up and went to bed and slept till nearly 11am.
The couch has got to go. There is stuff that we needed to do today but I am to distracted with back pain from the couch and tooth pain that is unbelievable to get anything done. I feel sort of lazy because of that but then again we have a long time (a month and a half at the very least) before we need to have the paper work done and I have already done a lot of work on it. But we are 6 days from our re-wedding (thank you to David (Paul's brother) and Mandi and Tony (Mandi and I work together) for being our witnesses and joining us that day. We are also 13 days till our first of the last adoption classes!
Goal for tomorrow, fill out 90% of my adoption paperwork and try to figure out something to do with this stupid tooth....
(added note....I am the one who picked out this couch because it was cheap....you get what you pay for, in our case though I think they should have paid us to take it)
When we got home last night I took all of the dogs out to potty and have a drink and some food before sending them to their beds for the night so little Emmy didn't make a peep until about 6am. Normally this would have given me about 4 hours of sleep and I would have sat, like a zombie, in front of the computer playing games. However, I have a very bad tooth that is causing so much pain that I have found myself in screaming pain that brings me to tears, and I had a really hard time sleeping. I fell asleep around 4:30-5am.
So, after taking princess Emmy out to potty I grabbed my pillow and a blanket and tried to sleep on the couch. I hate hate hate hate hate this couch! So there I am, cold, a cat on my head, Emmy wont leave me alone, tooth in pain, and now laying on the evil couch trying to sleep.... About an hour later Paul got up and went to bed and slept till nearly 11am.
The couch has got to go. There is stuff that we needed to do today but I am to distracted with back pain from the couch and tooth pain that is unbelievable to get anything done. I feel sort of lazy because of that but then again we have a long time (a month and a half at the very least) before we need to have the paper work done and I have already done a lot of work on it. But we are 6 days from our re-wedding (thank you to David (Paul's brother) and Mandi and Tony (Mandi and I work together) for being our witnesses and joining us that day. We are also 13 days till our first of the last adoption classes!
Goal for tomorrow, fill out 90% of my adoption paperwork and try to figure out something to do with this stupid tooth....
(added note....I am the one who picked out this couch because it was cheap....you get what you pay for, in our case though I think they should have paid us to take it)
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Busy Day
Today is going to be a very busy day! I like the busy ones, it makes laying around with Paul on Sunday so much more worth it.
First things first, talk Paul into taking me to breakfast, that shouldn't be hard, we almost always go to breakfast on Saturday morning. Then off to see the new Harry Potter movie in 3D at 9:45am, I am so excited about seeing it!! After that we will come home and I need to clean house, shower, re-blue my hair (my bangs are blue) because I am looking a little green, grocery shopping and then tonight we are going to a show at New Frontier (Paul's brother's band is playing). Oh, and through out today we will be haunting the Craigs list free ads watching for a better couch and other stuff.
Its hard to believe that this is the last Harry Potter movie, and kind of sad. At the same time its also exciting to know that soon (months from now) we will be able to share our love for these movies with our children and because of Harry Potter we have weeks and weeks of movies nights ahead of us!
Just a reminder....one week from today we will be re-married and in 2 weeks from today we will be starting the adopt classes!! I am so nervous and excited about this that I cant hardly stand it. Money is in the savings account and we are making a good headway into getting the money saved up.
First things first, talk Paul into taking me to breakfast, that shouldn't be hard, we almost always go to breakfast on Saturday morning. Then off to see the new Harry Potter movie in 3D at 9:45am, I am so excited about seeing it!! After that we will come home and I need to clean house, shower, re-blue my hair (my bangs are blue) because I am looking a little green, grocery shopping and then tonight we are going to a show at New Frontier (Paul's brother's band is playing). Oh, and through out today we will be haunting the Craigs list free ads watching for a better couch and other stuff.
Its hard to believe that this is the last Harry Potter movie, and kind of sad. At the same time its also exciting to know that soon (months from now) we will be able to share our love for these movies with our children and because of Harry Potter we have weeks and weeks of movies nights ahead of us!
Just a reminder....one week from today we will be re-married and in 2 weeks from today we will be starting the adopt classes!! I am so nervous and excited about this that I cant hardly stand it. Money is in the savings account and we are making a good headway into getting the money saved up.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Wedding Bells!
One week from tomorrow Paul and I will be re-married, not that we were ever unmarried but due to an error we are not 100% married. I am excited about the wedding, new friends Mandi and Tony will be joining us as well as Paul's brother David. We will always celebrate our first wedding anniversary as the real one.
It took me a while but I finally got a hold of someone to marry us. I had talked to one person who was going to do it for us for $250 at her home but after spending a week trying to get a hold of her again (we first talked about this back in March) and not getting through to her I said forget her and moved on. I called every judge in the area that does wedding and they were all either booked for the next several weeks or on vacation through August. Then I came across Cynthia online and gave her a call. That was that, we are all set for 7/30 at 1pm, at her home in North Tacoma, and for only $125!! It really seems like it was all meant to be. She sent me a list of different ring ceremonies and reminded me that this is a great time to renew our vows.
At first I didn't even think about renewing our vows. I mean I know that we want to at some point but now? Then I read through the vow options that Cynthia sent me, some were based on a couple and some were based on children and that got me thinking. This is a perfect time to renew our vows. We are opening a new chapter in our lives. Things have been going much better for us and we have really grown as individuals and as a couple, and a lot of the mistakes from our past are truly in our past and we can see them never happening again. No we are not perfect and we will never be, but we will always be perfect for each other.
As our new chapter in life opens we are looking forward to getting remarried next weekend, our adopt classes (15 days away, but who's counting...), moving into a larger and better home, the homestudy and adoption. The next 6 months for us is going to be huge and full of changes!
It took me a while but I finally got a hold of someone to marry us. I had talked to one person who was going to do it for us for $250 at her home but after spending a week trying to get a hold of her again (we first talked about this back in March) and not getting through to her I said forget her and moved on. I called every judge in the area that does wedding and they were all either booked for the next several weeks or on vacation through August. Then I came across Cynthia online and gave her a call. That was that, we are all set for 7/30 at 1pm, at her home in North Tacoma, and for only $125!! It really seems like it was all meant to be. She sent me a list of different ring ceremonies and reminded me that this is a great time to renew our vows.
At first I didn't even think about renewing our vows. I mean I know that we want to at some point but now? Then I read through the vow options that Cynthia sent me, some were based on a couple and some were based on children and that got me thinking. This is a perfect time to renew our vows. We are opening a new chapter in our lives. Things have been going much better for us and we have really grown as individuals and as a couple, and a lot of the mistakes from our past are truly in our past and we can see them never happening again. No we are not perfect and we will never be, but we will always be perfect for each other.
As our new chapter in life opens we are looking forward to getting remarried next weekend, our adopt classes (15 days away, but who's counting...), moving into a larger and better home, the homestudy and adoption. The next 6 months for us is going to be huge and full of changes!
Monday, July 18, 2011
Tears of joy....
I spent several hours today pouring through the pages and pages and pages of the fost/adopt application and writing out some of the answers to the questions. More than once I found myself in tears. Not that I was sad but in the words that I was writing and the topics I was writing about. For those that don't know the application gets very personal.
Some of my tearful moments were when writing about things that I experienced growing up, what my Mom was like, why I want to adopt, how I feel about my husband, and so on. In the part of the homestudy when the licenser comes out to the home there will be more questions. I hope I don't loose it then too.
While going through the papers I found that we were missing a couple of pages so I called the social worker. She was very nice and answered many of the questions that I had about the questions in the application because some of the questions didn't make much sense to me. One of the questions was relating parenting to a child's race and I was so lost and couldn't figure out what one had to do with the other. Apparently that's a good thing and my response that I don't see that one has to do with the other unless we are talking about teaching children about their heritage was the perfect answer.
We talked for about an hour and I feel great. She told me that there are tons of children that fit what we are looking for and because we are not going to fall into the hole of "I want a caucasian baby" that the whole process will go very easy and likely very quickly. Most people that are trying to adopt are looking for babies and in our state they are looking for caucasian babies, so there is a huge waiting list and there is no rush for the social workers to get them processed. We will likely be a rush job. She said that once we turn in our application that she will want to get everything scheduled with me right away and hopes to have us processed and fully approved with in 60 days of turning in the application and placed with in 90 days. We wont be turning in the application for about a month and a half, so looks like we will have to really make Thanks Giving dinner this year and yes we will have to put up the Christmas tree.....
Some of my tearful moments were when writing about things that I experienced growing up, what my Mom was like, why I want to adopt, how I feel about my husband, and so on. In the part of the homestudy when the licenser comes out to the home there will be more questions. I hope I don't loose it then too.
While going through the papers I found that we were missing a couple of pages so I called the social worker. She was very nice and answered many of the questions that I had about the questions in the application because some of the questions didn't make much sense to me. One of the questions was relating parenting to a child's race and I was so lost and couldn't figure out what one had to do with the other. Apparently that's a good thing and my response that I don't see that one has to do with the other unless we are talking about teaching children about their heritage was the perfect answer.
We talked for about an hour and I feel great. She told me that there are tons of children that fit what we are looking for and because we are not going to fall into the hole of "I want a caucasian baby" that the whole process will go very easy and likely very quickly. Most people that are trying to adopt are looking for babies and in our state they are looking for caucasian babies, so there is a huge waiting list and there is no rush for the social workers to get them processed. We will likely be a rush job. She said that once we turn in our application that she will want to get everything scheduled with me right away and hopes to have us processed and fully approved with in 60 days of turning in the application and placed with in 90 days. We wont be turning in the application for about a month and a half, so looks like we will have to really make Thanks Giving dinner this year and yes we will have to put up the Christmas tree.....
No get up and go....
We didn't get a thing done yesterday..... I am super antsy and Paul is trying to understand why but doesn't seem to be be getting it. The best way I can explain it to him is the feeling of needing to do something. Unfortunately he sees this as me needing to go out and do something and although that's fun, that's nor really the issue.
Whats making me antsy is this big fat stack of paper work that's packed with personal questions and my fear that I might spell a word wrong or that the reader wont be able to read my writing or that Paul's forms might have bad grammar and miss spelled words and that no one will know what the heck we are writing.
I am antsy about sitting down with the social worker and talking. They will ask a lot of personal questions and I know that I will be nervous (since I am nervous just thinking about it now)and I want the social worker to see us for who we are. Seeing you for who you are may make some fost/adopt parents nervous but I feel that they need to see that of us. We are not always as we seem. Paul may be a clown and out going and laid back but what you don't see is that he is very organized, emotional, and thrives on structure. I am relaxed on the outside and as you see in my writings I am stressed on the inside, and I think that the easiest way to describe myself is by saying "organized chaos" and that's because I love to plan and have lists of things to do and I use a day planner and try to keep things going as smoothly as possible but......some times....life happens and I change everything in an instant and go a different way. I always keep the same goal but the route to get there is suddenly different.
And, don't forget about the homestudy its self when the social worker will inspect my house.....
Of course, when talking about me being antsy I cant leave out the fact that we have more than just the paperwork and homestudy to do. Before we get there we need to do the PRIDE classes (19 days till they start), we need to get re-married (planning for 7/30/11), I need to get my Washington state drivers license (next week), we need to save money to move (we started this week and have over $100 after paying bills, that's a good start for us), we need to move (ug, finding a place with our credit is hard to do and finding a place that we can afford is just as hard but I am looking already) and then we need stuff.....beds, dressers, toys, home safety equipment and more.
So what can I do now to ease my anxiousness, well, I am going to get started on the paperwork today, going to clean my already clean house, do laundry, clean the rat cage, look at profiles of kids online (there are a couple of kids that I am super interested in) and search for paperwork that we need but have miss placed, and I will also send off for paperwork on my divorces!
Taking a look at a real time line that may be possible, August - PRIDE classes, September - CPR/first aide classes, get everything together for the application, Mid September to Early October - move and turn in application (likely to turn in application as soon as we have a move in date rather than waiting till we are moved in), October - homestudy, November - placement. Yes that's right, 4 short months. Paul talks about this like its a long time from now, and I see his point, that's in 4 months but something keeps chiming in my head "THAT'S IN 4 MONTHS" Wow.....4 months. Yes this process could take a little longer, yes would could have more classes and things to do, but yes it could go faster too....
Ok, trying to find my get up and go. Going to work on some paperwork.....
Whats making me antsy is this big fat stack of paper work that's packed with personal questions and my fear that I might spell a word wrong or that the reader wont be able to read my writing or that Paul's forms might have bad grammar and miss spelled words and that no one will know what the heck we are writing.
I am antsy about sitting down with the social worker and talking. They will ask a lot of personal questions and I know that I will be nervous (since I am nervous just thinking about it now)and I want the social worker to see us for who we are. Seeing you for who you are may make some fost/adopt parents nervous but I feel that they need to see that of us. We are not always as we seem. Paul may be a clown and out going and laid back but what you don't see is that he is very organized, emotional, and thrives on structure. I am relaxed on the outside and as you see in my writings I am stressed on the inside, and I think that the easiest way to describe myself is by saying "organized chaos" and that's because I love to plan and have lists of things to do and I use a day planner and try to keep things going as smoothly as possible but......some times....life happens and I change everything in an instant and go a different way. I always keep the same goal but the route to get there is suddenly different.
And, don't forget about the homestudy its self when the social worker will inspect my house.....
Of course, when talking about me being antsy I cant leave out the fact that we have more than just the paperwork and homestudy to do. Before we get there we need to do the PRIDE classes (19 days till they start), we need to get re-married (planning for 7/30/11), I need to get my Washington state drivers license (next week), we need to save money to move (we started this week and have over $100 after paying bills, that's a good start for us), we need to move (ug, finding a place with our credit is hard to do and finding a place that we can afford is just as hard but I am looking already) and then we need stuff.....beds, dressers, toys, home safety equipment and more.
So what can I do now to ease my anxiousness, well, I am going to get started on the paperwork today, going to clean my already clean house, do laundry, clean the rat cage, look at profiles of kids online (there are a couple of kids that I am super interested in) and search for paperwork that we need but have miss placed, and I will also send off for paperwork on my divorces!
Taking a look at a real time line that may be possible, August - PRIDE classes, September - CPR/first aide classes, get everything together for the application, Mid September to Early October - move and turn in application (likely to turn in application as soon as we have a move in date rather than waiting till we are moved in), October - homestudy, November - placement. Yes that's right, 4 short months. Paul talks about this like its a long time from now, and I see his point, that's in 4 months but something keeps chiming in my head "THAT'S IN 4 MONTHS" Wow.....4 months. Yes this process could take a little longer, yes would could have more classes and things to do, but yes it could go faster too....
Ok, trying to find my get up and go. Going to work on some paperwork.....
Sunday, July 17, 2011
20 Days Till PRIDE Classes!
We are only 20 days from the start of our PRIDE classes and I am beyond anxious. Not just about the classes but with all of the questions that I have and how fast can we make the process go and we have to move and we have soooooo much left to do. I know, we are at least, the very very least 2-3 months from having children in our home, but I cant keep my mind off it. Day and night I think about ways to try to ensure that everything is perfect for the homestudy and having everything in place.
Its a scary thought to realize that we will soon be parents. I use the word "soon" loosely, as Paul keeps pointing out that we are still months from becoming parents. Of course, being the type of person that I am, I like to think about the future a lot and make plans for things that could be over a year away. When riding in the car I often let my thoughts float off and think about what it will be like to drive back to Nevada with our children. Of course, I know that plans change and I am ok with that too. Even our move from Nevada to Washington didn't go as planned, but it worked and we changed the plan around as things happened to change it. That's the way it goes sometimes.
My plan for the day is to make linguica for breakfast, then do some work on our fost/adopt application, and look at some rentals online. I also plan to create a wish list of sorts of things that we need for homestudy and for our children's rooms. That's something that I will likely post here in case someone has something on the list that they are no longer using that we need.
Its a scary thought to realize that we will soon be parents. I use the word "soon" loosely, as Paul keeps pointing out that we are still months from becoming parents. Of course, being the type of person that I am, I like to think about the future a lot and make plans for things that could be over a year away. When riding in the car I often let my thoughts float off and think about what it will be like to drive back to Nevada with our children. Of course, I know that plans change and I am ok with that too. Even our move from Nevada to Washington didn't go as planned, but it worked and we changed the plan around as things happened to change it. That's the way it goes sometimes.
My plan for the day is to make linguica for breakfast, then do some work on our fost/adopt application, and look at some rentals online. I also plan to create a wish list of sorts of things that we need for homestudy and for our children's rooms. That's something that I will likely post here in case someone has something on the list that they are no longer using that we need.
Monday, July 11, 2011
Unwinding Complications
I spent most of today feeling yucky with the sniffles and cleaning house, but I got some good stuff done too!
For months I have been dreading the thought of how much it will cost to get copies of my final judgements from my divorces and today I called the courts. To my complete surprise one of them is going to cost me $1.50 and a self addressed stamp, and the other is just as cheap! I had this fear that I was going to need to drive to California and go into the court and get these things and spend a ton of money doing so.
Also, I got prices on getting the pets their rabies shots, I am pretty sure that they are all out of date and we have to have that done. I found a great price $15 each, which when you start adding its a lot but its better than $40 each!
We are well over a month away from even scheduling our homestudy and I am already stressed out over it. Feeling like I need to clean everything over and over again, even though we wont even have the homestudy here. A friend of mine called it "nesting" and although I see her point, she doesn't see mine....someone is coming to inspect my house before they will let us have children, that's far different than "nesting" when your getting towards the end of your pregnancy.
The stress of wanting a perfect homestudy is only made worse by the fact that our vacuum broke last week (me and my long hair killed another one) and we haven't replaced it yet. A few years ago this happened and I grabbed a brush and brushed the carpet, every room, wall to wall on my hands and knees. I realized today that I cant do that any more. My back (which is still healing from an injury that happened when I tripped over my flip flop a few months ago) will just not allow me to do that any more so I am sending Paul to WalMart tomorrow to by the cheapest vacuum they have since we are saving every cent we can for moving into a proper place to have children.
For months I have been dreading the thought of how much it will cost to get copies of my final judgements from my divorces and today I called the courts. To my complete surprise one of them is going to cost me $1.50 and a self addressed stamp, and the other is just as cheap! I had this fear that I was going to need to drive to California and go into the court and get these things and spend a ton of money doing so.
Also, I got prices on getting the pets their rabies shots, I am pretty sure that they are all out of date and we have to have that done. I found a great price $15 each, which when you start adding its a lot but its better than $40 each!
We are well over a month away from even scheduling our homestudy and I am already stressed out over it. Feeling like I need to clean everything over and over again, even though we wont even have the homestudy here. A friend of mine called it "nesting" and although I see her point, she doesn't see mine....someone is coming to inspect my house before they will let us have children, that's far different than "nesting" when your getting towards the end of your pregnancy.
The stress of wanting a perfect homestudy is only made worse by the fact that our vacuum broke last week (me and my long hair killed another one) and we haven't replaced it yet. A few years ago this happened and I grabbed a brush and brushed the carpet, every room, wall to wall on my hands and knees. I realized today that I cant do that any more. My back (which is still healing from an injury that happened when I tripped over my flip flop a few months ago) will just not allow me to do that any more so I am sending Paul to WalMart tomorrow to by the cheapest vacuum they have since we are saving every cent we can for moving into a proper place to have children.
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Odd Day
Today was such an odd day for me.
We went to breakfast at Mary Mary's in Spanaway, its our favorite breakfast spot and we talked about kids and adoption through most of the time we were there. What TV shows and cartoons we would like them to watch, which ones we don't, and which ones were our favorites when we kids. Good thing we have NetFlix! First DVD's to be ordered once we have children "Mr. Ed" from 1961. Neither of us were alive or even thought of yet in 1961 but we both agree that its a great show. We also talked about the violence in TV and cartoons, but thinking back to the Coyote and Road Runner.....well there isn't really a way to avoid it, but we plan to keep it to a minimum.
I went and got my nails and while I was there a Mom and her two daughters came in to get their nails all together and all I could think about was how much fun that would be fore me, expensive but fun. My mind even started to wonder off to the rules that I would need to set down for that, things like "no acrylics till your in high school" and that they would need to choose between pedicures or manicures when we went in but unless it was a special occasion they cant have both. I even thought about what Paul and his son could do while we were getting our nails done, maybe go to an arcade, go to Game Stop to pick out a new video game and other such things. A little fantasizing about what having children in our lives would be like in that moment. Even when the youngest of the two girls that were getting their nails started to cry because she wanted flowers pained on her nails (which would be an extra $10) I could hear myself saying things to our child in that situation to calm the issue and resolve it with out giving in.
After my nails were done I went to the Dollar Tree to get a few things. I love shopping there. Yes, some of the stuff is crap and some of the stuff I really love. I wondered through the craft section, as usual, and I came across some neat craft kits that I would love to do with a child. For a moment I started to smile and I nearly picked up some of them but I resisted (its way to early in the process to do that) and I went on to looking at books. Most of the books in the store are religious, puzzle books, coloring books or other kids stuff, but this time they had all sorts of parenting books. That's when I nearly burst into tears. I know how strange that must sound but I did. I was feeling very sad that we hadn't finished all of the classes and everything last year when we tried to start them. If we had finished then we could already have children and the woman in the nail shop could have been me. Ah! Waiting for the classes to start and to get everything going sucks!
On my way I home I noticed that the STP (Seattle to Portland bike ride) was today, as I nearly got run over by what seemed like 500 bikes at once. It took 10 minuets to pull out of the parking lot. My Dad rode in the STP a few years ago and that inspired me to call him when I got home. We talked about his new Droid phone and about adoption. I know my Dad thinks that we are nuts in wanting to adopt a sibling group of 2-4 children all at once but I know that is what will be right for us. Once our classes and homestudy and everything are complete, its not like they are going to knock on the door and drop of 4 kids. We will get to meet them and spend time with them and get to know them a bit first. I know that going from 0-4 possible children in the house may seem a little extreme to some people but you have to remember that we are only going to do this once and we know that we want more than one child. Ideally we want two, a boy and a girl, but the more I look at photo listing the more I really want three but four seems to be to much. We will have to wait and see because I can tell you now that if we find the two perfect kids and find out that they have two siblings, well then we will want all four unless there is a really really good reason that they shouldn't all be together.
So its been an emotional day, full of ups and downs. I even flipped through some of the application that we received in the mail. That makes me really nervous not that I fear that we will give bad answers but that our spelling and grammar and legibility will all be proper as its all done by hand and my writing can be very hard to read and Paul's spelling is worse than mine. But we will concur that in time. For the rest of the night I am going to sit here and sip some wine while watching Paul play a video game and petting the dog. Or, maybe I will visit a specific photo listing of some kids that are in the foster system and waiting to adopted, they have been there for a while and I know that this website is updated often. I haven't shown Paul this photo listing yet, I don't want to get any hopes up and I know that he's not really ready to look yet as we are not ready to have kids in our home just yet.... (speaking of our home, I bought box tape at the store today, you know for moving boxes, going to start packing soon)
The photo is of us from the 4th of July, we ended up going to the Freedom Fair after all. It was fun and we both got sunburned!
We went to breakfast at Mary Mary's in Spanaway, its our favorite breakfast spot and we talked about kids and adoption through most of the time we were there. What TV shows and cartoons we would like them to watch, which ones we don't, and which ones were our favorites when we kids. Good thing we have NetFlix! First DVD's to be ordered once we have children "Mr. Ed" from 1961. Neither of us were alive or even thought of yet in 1961 but we both agree that its a great show. We also talked about the violence in TV and cartoons, but thinking back to the Coyote and Road Runner.....well there isn't really a way to avoid it, but we plan to keep it to a minimum.
I went and got my nails and while I was there a Mom and her two daughters came in to get their nails all together and all I could think about was how much fun that would be fore me, expensive but fun. My mind even started to wonder off to the rules that I would need to set down for that, things like "no acrylics till your in high school" and that they would need to choose between pedicures or manicures when we went in but unless it was a special occasion they cant have both. I even thought about what Paul and his son could do while we were getting our nails done, maybe go to an arcade, go to Game Stop to pick out a new video game and other such things. A little fantasizing about what having children in our lives would be like in that moment. Even when the youngest of the two girls that were getting their nails started to cry because she wanted flowers pained on her nails (which would be an extra $10) I could hear myself saying things to our child in that situation to calm the issue and resolve it with out giving in.
After my nails were done I went to the Dollar Tree to get a few things. I love shopping there. Yes, some of the stuff is crap and some of the stuff I really love. I wondered through the craft section, as usual, and I came across some neat craft kits that I would love to do with a child. For a moment I started to smile and I nearly picked up some of them but I resisted (its way to early in the process to do that) and I went on to looking at books. Most of the books in the store are religious, puzzle books, coloring books or other kids stuff, but this time they had all sorts of parenting books. That's when I nearly burst into tears. I know how strange that must sound but I did. I was feeling very sad that we hadn't finished all of the classes and everything last year when we tried to start them. If we had finished then we could already have children and the woman in the nail shop could have been me. Ah! Waiting for the classes to start and to get everything going sucks!
On my way I home I noticed that the STP (Seattle to Portland bike ride) was today, as I nearly got run over by what seemed like 500 bikes at once. It took 10 minuets to pull out of the parking lot. My Dad rode in the STP a few years ago and that inspired me to call him when I got home. We talked about his new Droid phone and about adoption. I know my Dad thinks that we are nuts in wanting to adopt a sibling group of 2-4 children all at once but I know that is what will be right for us. Once our classes and homestudy and everything are complete, its not like they are going to knock on the door and drop of 4 kids. We will get to meet them and spend time with them and get to know them a bit first. I know that going from 0-4 possible children in the house may seem a little extreme to some people but you have to remember that we are only going to do this once and we know that we want more than one child. Ideally we want two, a boy and a girl, but the more I look at photo listing the more I really want three but four seems to be to much. We will have to wait and see because I can tell you now that if we find the two perfect kids and find out that they have two siblings, well then we will want all four unless there is a really really good reason that they shouldn't all be together.
So its been an emotional day, full of ups and downs. I even flipped through some of the application that we received in the mail. That makes me really nervous not that I fear that we will give bad answers but that our spelling and grammar and legibility will all be proper as its all done by hand and my writing can be very hard to read and Paul's spelling is worse than mine. But we will concur that in time. For the rest of the night I am going to sit here and sip some wine while watching Paul play a video game and petting the dog. Or, maybe I will visit a specific photo listing of some kids that are in the foster system and waiting to adopted, they have been there for a while and I know that this website is updated often. I haven't shown Paul this photo listing yet, I don't want to get any hopes up and I know that he's not really ready to look yet as we are not ready to have kids in our home just yet.... (speaking of our home, I bought box tape at the store today, you know for moving boxes, going to start packing soon)
The photo is of us from the 4th of July, we ended up going to the Freedom Fair after all. It was fun and we both got sunburned!
Getting Down To Business
Well, things are starting to get serious around here. We are a couple of weeks away from the PRIDE classes and we got the fost/adopt application in the mail yesterday. There is so much that we need to do....
Get my WA drivers license (I still have NV)
Get remarried
Create a good solid budget and start making cuts
Save money so we can move around the end of Aug./beginning of Sept.
Get copies of our divorce decrees from our pasts
And the list goes on and on and on!
Long list or no, we are so freaking excited, and nervous. If things go nice and smooth its possible for us to have children in a few months. Just saying that scares me and excites me at the same time. Will I be a good Mom?
I have wanted this for so long and now we are coming up to making it happen and I fear that I wont be a good parent or that I will be to protective or that I will baby them or, or, or, or. Well, you can see where I am going on that. Although I know that a lot of my fears are silly, there is one that I know isn't so silly. Because I have wanted this for so long I know that there will be a "honeymoon" period once we have our children and I don't want to find myself stuck in the mindset of "everything is wonderful" when I know that things will not always be wonderful and that we will have ups and downs. Other fost/adopt Mom's that I have talked to say that the fact that I am aware of this will help. I'm so nervous and Paul....he seems to be cool and relaxed about it all and I don't think that he worries as much as I do about it all.
Get my WA drivers license (I still have NV)
Get remarried
Create a good solid budget and start making cuts
Save money so we can move around the end of Aug./beginning of Sept.
Get copies of our divorce decrees from our pasts
And the list goes on and on and on!
Long list or no, we are so freaking excited, and nervous. If things go nice and smooth its possible for us to have children in a few months. Just saying that scares me and excites me at the same time. Will I be a good Mom?
I have wanted this for so long and now we are coming up to making it happen and I fear that I wont be a good parent or that I will be to protective or that I will baby them or, or, or, or. Well, you can see where I am going on that. Although I know that a lot of my fears are silly, there is one that I know isn't so silly. Because I have wanted this for so long I know that there will be a "honeymoon" period once we have our children and I don't want to find myself stuck in the mindset of "everything is wonderful" when I know that things will not always be wonderful and that we will have ups and downs. Other fost/adopt Mom's that I have talked to say that the fact that I am aware of this will help. I'm so nervous and Paul....he seems to be cool and relaxed about it all and I don't think that he worries as much as I do about it all.
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Happy Adoption Day (song)
Oh, who would have guessed, who could have seen
Who could have possibly known
All these roads we have traveled, the places we've been
Would have finally taken us home
Chorus:
So here's to you, three cheers to you
Let's shout it, "Hip, hip, hip, hooray!"
For, out of a world so tattered and torn,
You came to our house on that wonderful morn
And all of a sudden this family was born
Oh, happy Adoption Day!
There are those who think families happen by chance
A mystery their whole life through
But we had a voice and we had a choice
We were working and waiting for you
Chorus
No matter the name and no matter the age
No matter how you came to be
No matter the skin, we are all of us kin
We are all of us one family
Chorus
Who could have possibly known
All these roads we have traveled, the places we've been
Would have finally taken us home
Chorus:
So here's to you, three cheers to you
Let's shout it, "Hip, hip, hip, hooray!"
For, out of a world so tattered and torn,
You came to our house on that wonderful morn
And all of a sudden this family was born
Oh, happy Adoption Day!
There are those who think families happen by chance
A mystery their whole life through
But we had a voice and we had a choice
We were working and waiting for you
Chorus
No matter the name and no matter the age
No matter how you came to be
No matter the skin, we are all of us kin
We are all of us one family
Chorus
Another 4th of July.....
Well, tomorrow is the 4th of July, again. The reason that I say it like that is because every year I think about 4th of July celebrations that I experienced growing up. Spending the day at the lake, watching the fire works with family and friends, getting a sun burn, staying up late, and just having a good time. Every year I think about all of the fun things that I want to share with a child or children.
Last year we checked out the "Freedom Festival" in Ruston and we talked about what we would do the next year with our children. Those plans will not take place. We were not able to finish our PRIDE classes because the ran to late at night and I get up to early in the morning to be up until 11pm. Yes, we are going to classes next month (they start in 1 month and 3 days, but who's counting) but its still hard to see another 4th of July come and go.
This year we are going to the celebration in Steilacoom which should be fun. There will be a parade and street fair and fire works at night (we wont be staying for those though). Our plan is to have a good time and determine what we will do next year with our children, should we have them.
I know I shouldn't be so negative but this has been such a long year for us and every time we turn around some thing else happens. Just trying to keep our eyes on the future for the moment.
Last year we checked out the "Freedom Festival" in Ruston and we talked about what we would do the next year with our children. Those plans will not take place. We were not able to finish our PRIDE classes because the ran to late at night and I get up to early in the morning to be up until 11pm. Yes, we are going to classes next month (they start in 1 month and 3 days, but who's counting) but its still hard to see another 4th of July come and go.
This year we are going to the celebration in Steilacoom which should be fun. There will be a parade and street fair and fire works at night (we wont be staying for those though). Our plan is to have a good time and determine what we will do next year with our children, should we have them.
I know I shouldn't be so negative but this has been such a long year for us and every time we turn around some thing else happens. Just trying to keep our eyes on the future for the moment.
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