PROGRESS!!

We got a call from our social worker last night and we have meetings with her in two weeks! She is going to meet with us in her office first and we are meeting with her separately. I knew that she would do an interview with us one at a time but I thought it would be in our home. So I am a little relieved that it will not be in our home (although she will be coming over at some point). At the same time the individual interviews not being in our home make me a little nervous.

Personally I know that I will do fine in the interview and give all of the right answers. I am not trying to be cocky or think that I am perfect but I always interview well, I retain information really well, and I have been through one of these interviews before. My husband, however, gets nervous easy and you can see that nervousness all over his body. He might be better off if this was in our home where he is more comfortable. I am sure that all will be fine though. My interview is the day before his, so I can come home and go over the questions with him and help him prepare for his interview.

This is such a huge leap forward from where we have been and this means that we are getting very close to finishing our licensing process. Soon, we will be parents! (by soon I mean some time this year)

So whats left now? We still need to get all of our background check information in (we have Paul's, I am just finishing writing out a statement, and my letter is on the way to us and then I need to write out a statement). We have our first interviews scheduled for 2 weeks from now, and then its the home visit and that I think that just might be it!! All done! Of course, often times we have to do a second home visit because we could be missing something. I will be going over the check list and making sure that we have everything, anything that we are missing I will pick up when we get our income taxes back, likely to be February 1st. We will also be getting a van with our tax return. We cant wait for this new chapter in our lives to start!

Excitement!

I couldn't be more excited! Our background checks came back, and that is a huge step forward for us! It has been one of my big fears, that something from our past would pop up on a background check and our path to parenthood would come to a halt. We are pleasantly surprised.

Although while reading through our next steps I hear Ricky saying "Lucy, you have some explaining to do" its not as bad or as scary as I feared and the person that is going through all of our information for this part of it is really nice and easy to work with.

So, next up for us is to get a hold of some documents (already sent for), write out some statements (already mostly done), turn those things in and then we should be to the home visit. Things should really start moving fast now!

In a few short months, we WILL be parents!

Our little girl, our first child....she is out there, we just have to find her and bring her home.

AHHHHH!

Today has been a really crappy day. I am completely stressed and feel like I am on the brink of snapping any moment. Granted, Mondays are usually rough at work but this one hit me even harder and most of it had nothing to do with work at all.

I hate to get overly personal but if your a woman you might understand this one. Have you ever had a late period? The one that you know is coming but its stalled for no reason at all. Your hormones are at their peak, everything irritates you, your head throbs with vicious head aches, you want to eat everything in sight, and you have cramps like you have never had before.

Needless to say everything at work today feels like it went wrong, I couldn't get anything right, my boss seemed annoyed with me (I was annoyed with everyone), our weekly supervisor meeting lasted 45 minutes longer than it should have (with my husband blowing up my phone, that was on vibrate in my pocket, because I hadn't text him yet) and the day just sucked.

On my way home I stopped at the store to get some medicated shampoo for the dogs because they are pulling their fur out due to some weird itchy dry skin thing (no fleas) and everyone in the store was in my way. I get out of the store and bump the van next to me with my hip and the woman in the van glares at me like I smacked it with a hammer and left a fat dent. All this while talking on the phone with my husband who wouldn't stop talking long enough to hear anything I said to him.

Once I was finally headed down the road my husband called me again to tell me about a letter that we got from DSHS. Again they have sent our adoption papers back to us saying that things were not in our paper work and those things ARE in the paper work. I am so sick of that! Last time they even highlighted answers to questions saying that I didn't answer them. All this when I thought that we were done with all of the paper work from the application.

Its 5:45pm, my husband is off work at 6:30pm, I haven't made dinner, I don't want to make dinner and I don't really want to eat anything at all. I just want a hot cup of tea, my PJ's, a movie on my lap top and to be in bed. I am really done with this day.

Busy week ahead!!

I know its been a long time since I posted.....we have been trying to get everything together and figured out.

This week I am on vacation from work. I don't remember ever having a paid vacation before but I am putting it to good use. I will be spending the week finishing getting our house together for our homestudy and turning in our applications. This is going to be a very busy week!

My plans for today:

Watch CraigsList for stuff that we still need.
Rearrange our bedroom.
Figure out how we are going to have the dogs once we have kids (since 2 of them don't get along with 1)
Move all of our cleaning supplies into our bathroom.
Move all medications/vitamins into our bathroom.
Review information about what we need for our adoption.
Deep clean the apartment.
and on and on and on.....

PRIDE Graduation!

Yesterday was our last class and we have graduated PRIDE training! I was feeling very nervous about that yesterday and for no reason, I was just afraid that something would happen and we would have to redo all or part of some of the classes. Not everyone in our class graduated and some have make up work to do, but we did it! We finally got through it! I had to turn in the PRIDE training book that I have been dragging around with me for a year but they did give us a disk of the book which will make it easier when I want to look something up. We still have a lot to do before we are ready to adopt though.




So whats next.....

Now the push is really on to get moved, we looked at an apartment yesterday, I really liked it, Paul didn't like some of the people that he saw in the complex. I didn't notice what he did. Its possible that I was overly focused on the great 3 bedroom apartment, fire place, 4 play grounds, 2 pools, hot tub, small gym and the fact that there is a YMCA near by. Some times I have blinders on and don't see everything around me. Which is why I really prefer looking at these places together.




We still have a lot that we need to do and a lot that we need to get. Its a little stressful but we have the big and hard part done. The rest is just following the process.

Our Current To Do List:

Find A New Place
Move
Pet Shots (we have a shot clinic today for the dogs)
Get Copies Of Divorce Decrees and New Marriage License
TB Tests
Physicals
Finish Paper Work and Turn It In (cant do until we have moved)
FBI Checks
Create House Rules & Discipline
Create Evacuation Plan (cant do until we have moved)
Make Lists Of Schools/Licensed Day Care (cant do until we have moved)
Car Insurance (we need something new and cheaper)


Things We Know We Need Once We Have Moved:

4 Beds (twin beds or bunk beds, no we don't want 4 kids but want to make sure we are prepared for anything)
4 Twin Sized Mattress Covers
4 Sets Of Twin Sized Bedding
4 Pillows
4 New Towels
4 Small Dressers or 2 Large Ones
First Aide Kit
CPR Mask
New Fire Extinguisher
Outlet Covers
2 Laundry Baskets
Locking Door Nob For Our Bedroom
A Way To Lock Up Cleaning Supplies
Toys, Clothes, Shoes, Books
The List Could Go On A Mile.


Today we are taking the dogs to get their shots, this should be fun since they are still not all getting along so we have to take separate cars and will need to pull out the muzzles. Also, we are going to look some more for rentals.

Feeling very nervous!

I don't know what the deal is, but I feel very nervous. Yesterday I finally got my Washington drivers license (the picture is really bad), and they made me take the written test since I hadn't taken it since I was 15, but I did get a 100% on the test. Today is our last adoption class. We expect it to be a longer class and there will be a panel of foster kids in the class today. Sunday we have the shot clinic for the dogs and we are going to go look at this super nice apartment complex that we have been talking about. Next weekend we start the CPR/First Aide/Blood Born Deceases classes.

I guess maybe its that everything is coming together and we are getting closer and closer to our homestudy which will lead to placement. We still have awhile (a few months) but its coming up quick. This month just flew by.

Whats getting to me right now is some work stuff, moving, finishing PRIDE class, pet shot clinics, saving money, our current apartment complex, CPR class, and of the homestudy that we are not even close to having yet. There is just so much that we need and so much that we need to do.

(oh, my arm lumps turned out to be torn muscles and mostly healed up now)

Feeling a little stressed this morning....

I have so much on my mind right now, all of the things that we need to get done and its giving me a real sense of stress and urgency even though it shouldn't. We still have two weeks of PRIDE classes left and then our first aide/CPR classes the next month and we still have other stuff to do to before we can even think about finishing our paper work and turning it in. Yet I feel stressed to move from this apartment like I have to do it right now. Really, the only reason that we are here is because its cheap and we can save money while we are living here so that we can move and do all of the other things that we need to do before we turn in our paper work. I just cant shake the stress of feeling like we need to be moved. I know deep down that when the time comes I will find us the right house at the right price. Just the other day I was talking to a guy about his rental and had him talked down from $1,500 for a deposit to $800. I really need to stop focusing so much on moving and really look into all of the other things we need to do, like getting our physicals done, getting the pets their shots, changing the oil in the car, and so on. Also adding to my stress at the moment is this odd lump in my arm, you cant see it, but I can feel it, its on the muscle and sore to the touch and hard. If it gets worse I may need to go to the doctor.

Today is the first day of our classes!

Last night I was super super sick. It started at work, I threw up once and then started feeling better, that is until we had dinner. After dinner I started having chills, sweating and my whole body hurt. I was terrified that I would feel like that this morning too. So I went to bed. I piled on the blankets and buried my head in them hoping for some sort of relief. A few hours later we were woken up by a super loud argument going on out side that felt like it lasted for hours, and I felt even worse. Then, after hours and hours of sleep (I went to bed around 6pm and got up at 5:30am, which is sleeping in for me) my alarm clock went off and I got up. I still have a headache and my back hurts (due to my bed) but I don't feel sick any more!!

This week went by so slow for me, knowing that the classes start today, but we are finally here. I talked to someone from the NWAE.org the other day and got some interesting information about what they do and how it all works, and that has me even more excited. There are kids on their site that I really like and that I want to meet. I haven't told Paul too much about them because he doesn't like to see something, get excited about it and then have it not work out. Until we get our classes done and the homestudy done there really isn't any reason to get to involved in looking at kids. The NWAE really makes it very easy and they are very helpful. They, like everyone else, did tell me about how its harder to adopt through foster care directly than it is to go through an agency. Although I do understand why they are saying that, its way cheaper (as in free) to adopt through the state and since I already have my eye on a set of kids that are on the NWAE website, that cuts out some of the hard stuff.

Yes, I am sure that it might be easier to hand over a wad of money to an agency and tell them to find you kids with certain qualities and let them match you up, but it makes much more sense to me to do this our way. We would rather save that wad of money to spend on kids and I would rather find them myself. As I learned from my Dad a long time ago, the easy way is not always the right way and many times is the wrong way. While looking through the children that are posted on sites like NWAE.org I try very hard to not look at their disabilities and things (should they have any) and try to focus on who they are. Doing it that way makes much more sense to me, after all, if I were pregnant, would we reject our child due to a disability. Of course at the same time I know that I will not take on a child with disabilities that I wouldn't know how to handle since we are adopting older children, its not as though we would have them since birth and been able to adjust slowly to something. The kids that I have my eye on do not have any disabilities that I have read about, but they do have some emotional issues, after going through what they have been through and living in foster care and what not, I expect that any child we adopt will have emotional issues.

Ok, that's all for now, I am off to start getting ready to go!!

(Did I mention that we got a new couch! Its blue leather! And it was free!!)

Wedding Bells!

One week from tomorrow Paul and I will be re-married, not that we were ever unmarried but due to an error we are not 100% married. I am excited about the wedding, new friends Mandi and Tony will be joining us as well as Paul's brother David. We will always celebrate our first wedding anniversary as the real one.

It took me a while but I finally got a hold of someone to marry us. I had talked to one person who was going to do it for us for $250 at her home but after spending a week trying to get a hold of her again (we first talked about this back in March) and not getting through to her I said forget her and moved on. I called every judge in the area that does wedding and they were all either booked for the next several weeks or on vacation through August. Then I came across Cynthia online and gave her a call. That was that, we are all set for 7/30 at 1pm, at her home in North Tacoma, and for only $125!! It really seems like it was all meant to be. She sent me a list of different ring ceremonies and reminded me that this is a great time to renew our vows.

At first I didn't even think about renewing our vows. I mean I know that we want to at some point but now? Then I read through the vow options that Cynthia sent me, some were based on a couple and some were based on children and that got me thinking. This is a perfect time to renew our vows. We are opening a new chapter in our lives. Things have been going much better for us and we have really grown as individuals and as a couple, and a lot of the mistakes from our past are truly in our past and we can see them never happening again. No we are not perfect and we will never be, but we will always be perfect for each other.

As our new chapter in life opens we are looking forward to getting remarried next weekend, our adopt classes (15 days away, but who's counting...), moving into a larger and better home, the homestudy and adoption. The next 6 months for us is going to be huge and full of changes!

Haunted by the home study!

I woke up this morning to the horrid sound of my alarm clock. For a moment I was lost as I had been having a very intense dream about the home study that we will go through once we have moved and our classes our final. For those that don't know, a home study is when a social worker of sorts comes to you home and talks about your family, your extended family, and goes through all sorts of things in your to make sure that your ready and have everything the state requires you to have for foster care and/or adoption.

In this haunting dream that I was having, the one the alarm clock woke me up from, we were moving into our place, another apartment. As planned, I was making our new home ready for the home study as we were moving, but I was missing something. You know those little child safety plugs that you can get, they are usually white and cover your power outlets.... Well, we were missing one.

The next day, in this dream, was our home study and I wasn't able to replace the one outlet cover and we failed our home study. Just then, the alarm clock went off and I woke up.

I know that if we are missing something in our home study that we will be allowed to get it and do the study again, or part of it again, and I also know that after having this dream I will buy extra of little things like this!